Man, the Perfect Compliment to Woman

Perhaps you're curious about what brought me to the conclusion that I'm a serial casual dater. Maybe not, but I’m going to explain anyway.

I spent most of my teens and 20s with one man and from about 25 to 30 with another. Now, when I say 'spent,' I should clarify. One would assume that I infer a lengthy relationship but that's not the case. With both men, it was an odd, back and forth, on again off again relationship that wasn't healthy and didn't make either of us particularly happy.

Being that I had these back and forth relationships, I dated in between. Through all the dating, the relationships, the hook ups, the younger men, the older men and so on, I have expected two things: respect and sincerity but I searched for love. Most likely, the love I never received from my own father. Freudian? Yes, but probably dead on.

I understand you can't change a person, and really, you shouldn't want to. But, in letting someone be true to who they are, you have to be true to who you are. And for me respect is the deal breaker. The thing that makes me walk away without so much as a word.

At this point, I know myself. I know what it takes to make me happy and I know what I want. Number one, I want a strong, fulfilling career. I don’t see myself having children. I don’t believe in making the man in my life the center of it. And while I do hope to one day have a healthy relationship, I’m in no hurry. I’d rather wait and have that healthy relationship then have someone now and live in chaos.

Typically, when I meet men, I turn them down, or don't answer, or give a fake number, or don't reply to text's, or say I'm married, have a boyfriend, have a job, a class, have to wash my hair, and so on. I'm going to start accepting these dates, if for no other reason then to prove my friends wrong in thinking I'm too picky and closed off.

In saying all of this, I mean to show that basically, my entire dating life has been casual serial dating. One guy to the next. No one that's too terribly memorable. Often, I can't remember what man my friends are asking about. One goes away, another one comes along...

I figure that if I had blogged my love life until this point it would have been a best seller or at minimal, it would have made a few people laugh. I'm certain 2011 will be no different. So here's to a serial casual dating in 2011.